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When a record has a scratch on it, the needle can cease its normal progress to the centre and go round and round in the same groove, repeating the same sound again and again, unless it is helped across by someone.
Many many people are like scratched records saying the same things over and over again. They think they are saying something new each time, because their feelings are fresh. But the words are the same and only someone tied to them by bonds of infinite love and compassion can stand hearing them repeat themselves infinitely.
This is somewhat similar to what I call vRttis, or circles.
People go round and round the same patterns of behaviour, the same thoughts and the same speech. Others can see easily how these people are trapped and what they have to do to get out.
But even if some compassionate and wise person tells them, they can’t step out, because of their strong desire and attachment to something.
They are in the grip of a powerful idea that they have thought about for a long time and become attached to.
One of the advantages of maintaining a diary is that you can see for how many years you have been having the same feelings and been complaining about the same thing.
In the case of someone like Thyagaraja, this may be a good thing because you get many awesome compositions on the same theme. “Rama, let me serve you! Rama let me see you! “ and so on.
But very often, it can bore the daylights out of the listeners.
Sometimes you can get out of a vRtti just by recognising that you are in a circular groove or rut. Sometimes it takes a little more effort.
Meditation, pilgrimages, vacations, movies and books all help to temporarily take you out of your vRtti groove by making you conscious of something else. But when you come back, you slowly fall back into the same rut all over again.
You have to decide to get out of your vRtti behaviour pattern and implement that decision.
The moment someone says ‘I am miserable, I can’t help it, I have to suffer’ Or ‘Everyone is such an idiot or so deceitful or so cold etc’ or some such – you can recognise they are in a vRtti.
Only participants in that vRtti (if it is a joint one) will last for a long time. Otherwise these people will have a flux of friends people who come try to help and go away after being bored thoroughly. Or at least refuse to listen when these people complain.
You are not helpless. You can give up your attachments and aversions. You can change your behaviour patterns. You can change the people you interact with and the way you interact with the same people.
kAma means desire. It is Born of attachment and fathers anger, which leads to confusion, loss of memory and destruction of all that has been learned. That attachment is born of continuously thinking about sensations – stuff that your senses continually feed you. (Bhagavad Gita)
kAma may be worshipped separately as a dEva or as an aspect of viSNu (viSNu sahasranAma).
If you are too weak to fight your attachments or desires, bow to kAma and take his help. It works best. “I can’t win over you, please let me past”. All dEvAs are compassionate and feel your pain more acutely than you do. So they will surely grant your wish!
Jai kAma dEva!!
